Today is International Women’s Day.

It’s a day that asks more than celebration, it asks remembrance. Not just of women’s beauty, but of women’s labor, resilience, and rights. It’s a global event that says: women’s lives are not a side note. They are infrastructure. They hold families, communities, and economies, often while being told to take up less space.

Growing up in Turkmenistan, International Women’s Day wasn’t just a date, it was a ritual of honoring women. I still remember the first time my brother brought roses for both my mom and me. I felt seen. Included. Valued.

And I’ve been thinking about that word — valued — because so many of us learned a substitute version of it.

We learned to earn value through appearance. Through size. Through youth. Through being impressive. Through being desirable. Through being quiet.

But value was never supposed to be conditional.

Two photos. One truth.

I want to show you both, because I think a lot of women will recognize this: Neither version of me felt like freedom.

When I was overweight, I carried shame; publicly and privately. I learned how to shrink, even when I was physically taking up more space. I avoided mirrors. I made myself smaller in rooms before anyone asked me to.

When I became my skinniest, I thought happiness would arrive like a reward. But it didn’t. The body changed, but the nervous system didn’t. My mind still hunted for flaws. My worth still felt conditional.

Here’s the truth I didn’t understand then:Your body can change dramatically and still not feel like home, if you don’t have peace within.

I didn’t need a “better” body.I needed a safer inner world.

The core insight: peace is what makes any body livable

We spend so much time treating the body like a project. Something to fix,  to control, to upgrade. But many women aren’t suffering because of their bodies. They’re suffering because of what they were taught to believe about their bodies.

And that belief system is profitable. It keeps you chasing. It keeps you comparing. It keeps you distracted. It keeps you spending emotional energy every day on a problem that was manufactured.

International Women’s Day matters because it’s a reminder:

The fight for women has never been about perfection. It’s been about agency: the right to exist without punishment, to age without apology, to be valued beyond appearance, and to direct your own life.

This is also why I’m sharing a new Rise + Rebel episode today, because the “weight” I carried was never just physical. It was shame, disconnection, and the belief that love had a prerequisite.

🎙 New Episode: “The Weight I Was Carrying Wasn’t Just Physical.”

In this episode, I talk about:

• Growing up overweight in America and learning to shrink

• Avoiding mirrors and feeling like I took up “too much space”

• Losing nearly 100 pounds after leaving a toxic marriage

• Realizing my body didn’t need punishment, it needed peace

• And yes… aging too

Wrinkles aren’t a crime. They’re chapters. Proof you lived.

One practical takeaway (for today)

If you want a simple way to practice peace, without forcing positivity, try this:

Write one sentence to your body that isn’t about appearance.

Something like:

• “Thank you for carrying me through hard years.”

• “Thank you for keeping me alive when my mind wasn’t kind.”

• “I’m learning how to live with you, not against you.”

Peace isn’t a vibe. It’s a practice. And for many women, it starts with ending the war inside.

A note to the men in Aya’s Inner Circle

Brothers, husbands, sons: take care of the women in your life. Not by praising how “young” they look, but by honoring their strength, their wisdom, and the realities they carry.

If you want to give a woman something meaningful today: offer presence, protection, partnership, and respect... especially when no one is watching.

Listen + share

🎧 Listen to the episode here

If it resonates, forward it to someone you love. And if you’re willing, leave a review so this message reaches more people.

We rise with elegance. We rebel against shame.

With love,

Aya

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